New Year's Resolutions: Bah Humbug!

I'm in trouble now. My wife's made her one and only New Year's resolution. We (read 'me') are going to start using grocery coupons. It seems there's a great deal of money to be saved by taking the time to cut out all these pieces of paper, checking the expiration dates, looking at the fine print to make sure they don't require the purchase of a calf's brain with the item in question, etc. I'm the one who does most of the grocery shopping in our family. I often see (mostly) women standing in the aisles going through stacks of little pieces of paper to save 10¢ on a 60 lb. purchase of Crisco. Here's how I shop: I (we) make out a list. I stick to it religiously with the lone exception being if I see something one or more of the grand children would like, I buy it. Other than that, if it's not on the list, it doesn't get bought. When I see the item I want on the shelf, I toss it in the basket. Sometimes I'll check to see if buying a larger quantity will yield significant savings but that's it. I simply can't be bothered with coupons-up to now, that is. Besides, half the time I walk off leaving them on the counter. (I wonder what Freud would say about that?) Another thing I usually do is get name brand items. Contrary to what a lot of people say, buying the store brand often results in an inferior product, i.e. Stop & Shop 'Oat O's' vs. General Mills 'Cheerios'. No comparison. Cheerios are much better. But all this whining is academic because there behind me, on the family room coffee table is a pile of graffiti. And not far away is our little wood-burning stove, perking away. My wife just left to get her nails done. Hmmmmm.